Sheepish. Exultant. I waffle between these two feelings...a result of recent spur-of-the-moment and in-my-sleep actions.
First: Sheepish. A week ago, I was watching an infomercial. I've seen it 3 or 4 times, and this time they were so convincing. It was for the 21-Day-Fix, and trust me when I say, I needed to "fix" my eating habits. When you are eating Golden Oreos between every meal, it's time for something drastic. So when the lady kept saying, "It's just so easy...you can eat anything that fits in these containers", I believed her. Suddenly, I was on the phone ordering that 21-Day-Fix. The guy taking my order was over-the-top polite, complimenting me on my lifestyle change, asking if I would like to upgrade to the "Ultimate Package". Turns out the Ultimate Package was sixty dollars, and luckily, I heard Scott's voice in the background, "What is this sixty dollar charge on our card?" So, I kept to the basic package for the poor folks, and waited patiently for the package to arrive.
Later that day, I was putting Chaim's carseat in the car and torqued my back. As in: seriously hurt it. For the next 4 days...I laid on the floor with Epson salt compresses on my back, slept in the Lay-Z-Boy chair, and ate Golden Oreos. When the package arrived, I didn't open it for two days, because I couldn't lift it off the ground. Finally, when I opened it, those seemingly huge containers turned into teeny-tiny boxes. That box sat on our kitchen table for another 2 days. It was easy to avoid while eating Golden Oreos and driving to the physio-therapist for yet another appointment. Finally, I could walk on Saturday, and I enjoyed celebrating Easter by expanding my food choices to three different varieties of cake (supplemented by an occasional oreo).
I went to bed on Sunday night, thinking "I'll start that 21-Day Fix later this week..." Sometime during the night, I had a dream that I was on my diet. I stopped eating oreos. I filled those teeny-tiny boxes with broccoli and cauliflower. And when I woke up in the morning, the idea was fixed: I was healthy. It was like my own little version of Inception--and the idea had firmly planted. And this is why I'm exultant--there is a half-eaten bag of Golden Oreos in the pantry, and I couldn't care less. I am, however, excited for my plain oatmeal with cinnamon for breakfast, which fits in the little yellow box. Exultant.