Copywriting #6: Sour Grape to Vintage Wine

REALLY struggling with this one.  I've been putting it off for a week (maybe longer?)  I'm just gonna bust it out today, and move on.

Step One:  identify the "insane" person's seemingly unattainable goal.  (w/ soccer players: wanting to be on the World Cup Team.)

Step Two:  lower the bar some for diminished expectation audiences (maybe not world cup right now for a 13-year old, but why not getting on to a higher ranked team).  

Step Three:  offer product or service (get more time on the ball w/ a soccer camp)

THE ACTUAL AD:

"That's me when I'm 19." Meg says as she watches another World Cup game.  She has the schedule mapped out on her wall, watching every game.  Her own team schedule is mapped out beside it...a string of losses with her current team.

Maybe she won't get on the World Cup Team at 19, but it's possible to prepare for the next round of tryouts, and get on a higher-ranked team, a team with a string of wins.  A team that allows your daughter to learn more.  Play harder.  Definitely play smarter.

That playing smarter can start now.  Help her get more time on the ball while she has the time off for summer.  Sign up for Soccer Camp!  Soccer Camp is a great way to work on individual skills.  A great way to get more time and touches on the ball.  It's what every player needs.  

This local soccer camp is coached by local youth.  They'll help your daughter or son work on skills they need for the next round of tryouts.  

(okay for now--leaving it, and might come back to work on it later today or tomorrow.  But at least it is started!)

Copywriting #5: Emotional Math with Soccer Campos

I'm writing this one as an example flyer for soccer camps, since my girls are hosting a soccer camp this week.  They were hoping for 12 kids to sign up, and only have 5 (including their brother).  So, that makes 4 official paying players.  Not bad for their first-ever soccer camp, but it could definitely be improved.  I think I'd like to tackle how to advertise it more--maybe even to get a few more players for tomorrow?  Maybe for next year?  I think they have a really good idea--an affordable soccer camp for younger kids (ages 6-10).  They are 12 and 13, have been playing 8 years, the last 2 competitively, and they know quite a bit about soccer.  Helping others catch the vision...

THE COPY:

Soccer Camp is a great way to quickly increase individual skills!  It's even better than soccer practice, where the focus is on team play.  But here's the catch:  every coach expects the players to have individual skills, which begs the question:  where are they supposed to learn it?!  

The answer is SOCCER CAMP!!   

Soccer camp is totally worth the money--because the emphasis is on individual skills.  Skills like:

• footwork
• dribbling
• shooting goals
• throw-ins
• pull-backs
• and clearance kicks

If you've been saying to yourself, "I sure wish that Kate could be more confident on the field!", this is the camp to sign up for!  Or thought to yourself at the last game, "If he could improve in footwork, he'd really be a great player", then sign up now to lock in your spot!  

The Krim Soccer Camp is only $15 for 3 days of intense, individual coaching.  

Copywriting #4: College Prep Course (again w/ different aspect)

College Admissions is a Changing Landscape, and only the Richest can Play the Game...

Until NOW!

Instead of paying thousands of dollars for college prep, you can receive affordable and quality college prep for much less!  

You can access college-admissions results you want and need for much less when you buy the "College Knowledge 101" Program.  This digital course has all the same information as the big college-prep companies, because it was created by a former school counselor.  This counselor saw firsthand what would work and not work for the admissions game.  Instead of keeping these secrets, she wants to share them with YOU! 

For only $250, you can access the digital program that helps level the playing field of getting to and through college.  

You don't have to shell out thousands for college-prep meetings with an advisor that is servicing multiple students.  Instead, get this program, and access the program that answers:

• what sort of extra-curriculars are valued the most in admissions?
• where can a student receive the best financial aid package, when their family is in the middle-income bracket?
• how early should a student start considering college admissions?

Those questions probably sound familiar, right?  You don't have to figure it out alone.  Instead, sign up for this program that allows you to learn from others (both mistakes AND successes).  You'll save dozens of hours of personal research, with much better results.  Help yourself help your student make it to the college they want, for the affordable rate of $250.

Copy Assignment #3: How to say YES when your kids want a Dog

The request comes daily:  "Can we get a dog?"  

While the response has stayed the same for years:  "No".  Make that an emphatic "No!"

It's easy to understand why:  you wonder if you can handle a dog.  What if he barks constantly?  How fast could a dog destroy the furniture?  How do I handle a puppy jumping up on guests?  And the perennial question:  how long does it take to house train a dog?  That last question has kept your home dog free for years, because you simply don't have the time or energy to train a dog or clean up messes.  

I understand those fears, because my friend Ruth had the same ones.  She was always telling her kids  they couldn't get a dog.  For years she told them various reasons, and they really couldn't.  They didn't have the money, or her husband was in school, and there were so many demands on their time.  And a personal worry:  how would she keep up with cleaning all that dog hair?!  But she also recognized that a dog would be good for her kids.  A dog would help them get outside and exercise.  They would have to be responsible and feed the dog.  Her son could teach tricks and learn about daily habits.   But it still wasn't enough until she saw an ad for the animal shelter.

The animal shelter has a lot of dogs that need a good home, and many of these dogs are already trained.  You can get a more mature dog that knows to "sit and stay".  A dog that is house trained and will save your new carpet from multiple stains.  These dogs may have been abandoned by their former owners, or lost and never reclaimed.  They simply want to be loved and are very anxious to please their new owners.  These dogs are much more affordable than buying a purebred dog.  The adoption fee from an animal shelter is only $25.  And besides that, future dog owners can opt to "foster" a dog to make sure it's the right fit.  The right fit for the dog. The right for for the human.  

My friend Ruth told her kids they could possibly get a dog, and told them that very thing:  they needed to find the right dog for their family.  After doing a little bit of browsing on the animal shelter website, they found a few dogs that would be a good fit for their family:  past the puppy stage, house-trained, and good around kids.  

They went to the shelter on a couple different days, falling in love with several dogs.  They researched more about the dog breeds, and then picked the right dog for their family, their home and yard.  They are now fostering the dog with the option to adopt, and are so happy.  They had found the dog that met all they needed:  house-trained, calm around children, and minimal dog hair.  Ruth is relieved that she doesn't have to do it all alone.  Her children are big helpers with the dog:  taking him on walks, teaching him some new tricks, and helping him feel comfortable with lots of time and attention.  More than anything, Ruth is realizing how much joy the dog brings her.  She always thought the dog would be for her children...she didn't realize that she needed the dog!  Ruth loves how the dog will sit next to her while she is working and helps her feel safe when alone at home.  And an extra perk is that the dog gets her up for a morning run (instead of hitting the snooze button 5 times!).  

I know it's scary to get a pet, and that's why the Animal Shelter is there to help anyone looking to adopt a dog.  They help you foster without having to pay, and then keep the price low to allow more families to put that money towards dog food and dog treats rather than breeding fees!  If you've been saying no for years to a dog, it might be time to check out the animal shelter.  

Copy Assignment #2: Soccer Training for Wannabe Soccer Moms

I had a lot of fun writing this copy!  I stressed less, wrote faster, and laughed all throughout...because I've totally been there!  (And from what I've heard, there are similar rules in almost every sport / activity).  This is definitely written with a tongue-in-cheek sentiment after 8 years of being at soccer games (2 as a soccer mom, 6 as a coach)  Enjoy!  

----------------------------------------------

You do remember that feeling--showing up to the meeting and not fitting in?  And no, we're not talking about the 8th grade club meeting where you felt out of place and in over-your-head--we're talking about the first meeting for your son's soccer season where you also felt out of place and in over-your-head.  How did this happen?    

You had put it into the planner, set several reminders, and were even there 5 minutes before it began.  

Check

Check

Triple Check

The problem wasn't showing up--the problem was not knowing how to show up.  You had come straight from work, and while your professional slacks with blouse and blazer help you work your magic at the office, they don't help you with this "soccer mom" gig.  And the thing is:  you want to be a soccer mom, because those are going to be your people in the evenings and weekends for the near (and far) future.

We get it, because we've been there, too.  We've juggled working mom gig and the soccer mom gig plenty, and there are a few unwritten rules that will make your life easier, as well as more enjoyable.  We've put together a simple checklist to help you know:

• what to wear to team meetings
• when it is appropriate to stay for team practice, when you should leave
• how to talk to the coach about your son's practice (because he's really the star, obviously...)
• which chairs are "in", and which chairs are so last-year
• the hottest umbrella and canopy trends to keep you looking cool
• and so many other "unwritten rules" to help you rock the "soccer mom" gig

This checklist is your way to show up to every meeting, practice, and game as the Boss that you are.  We know you're busy, and want you to get back to doing the dozens of things you are doing without stressing about the upcoming soccer team party anymore (yes, the checklist covers those situations, too!).  For the small sum of $4.95, we will share this checklist with you immediately.  And if you're not certain by the next soccer tournament that you've learned your share of soccer terms and rules (off sides, anyone?!) and rules for engaging with parents of the opposite team (the trick is in the timing--before or after the match!), then you simply contact us for a total refund.  No questions asked.  We just want to get this checklist into as many up-and-coming soccer moms' screens as possible!  This is the fast-track to ridding yourself of the feeling you had at the last meeting, and replacing it with the competence you know in other aspects of your life, and can experience it here, too.

If ready to swap out that feeling of imposter soccer mom, and replacing it with soccer mom extraordinaire, click the link below to receive the most comprehensive soccer-mom checklist in mere minutes!

soccertraining4soccermoms.com 

Paying for College 101

This is my first attempt to write copy!  I thought I'd pretend to advertise my own college prep course, because I keep thinking...maybe I can market it and sell it as a way to help first-generation students!  (that could be in another marketing email--how this is written for them!)

Have you had that moment late at night, when you're looking through your finances and realize that while you might be able to start saving for retirement, you haven't really started saving for college?  Not for you...but for your children?!  It's easy to do...starting a career, starting a family, buying a house, figuring out life as it comes, and suddenly...WHAM!!  Here you are--just several years away from having a child attend college.  Maybe you have a daughter just starting 9th grade, and you know in 4 years she'll want to go to a great college just like her cousin did.  Or consider your son in 11th grade, who has good grades, but possibly not high enough for scholarships?  Is the worry in your chest growing, and you want to scream out...or go bury your head in the sand and pray it somehow goes away?

Instead of doing either, know this:  you can still find answers.  And a lot of them.   Your daughter can go to that college and sit in the classes and go to the football games.  Your son can go to the university and explore careers and find his own path.  

You don't have to get mad or give up, you can get help.  You can plan and pay for college with a step-by-step program that leaves you saying, "I know what I'm doing!" instead of feeling lost, confused and angry.  The best part is that you don't have to find them on your own, you can use a tried and experienced college-planning guide to help you. 

That's where this all-new college-prep course comes in.  This is a course that is easy-to-follow for students and their parents that wonder

• What grades do I need for college?
• When should I be looking for colleges?
• How can I find colleges out of state?  
• and so many more questions!!

The course includes lessons of information specific to searching out colleges and scholarships, and then assignments to help you build your own successful path.  

In case you're thinking, "that's for people that have a lot of money...we're just trying to get college paid for!"  think again...this business is built on the model to help students from middle-income families get to and through college.  This business is for first-generation students to reach college without signing up for numerous loans.  Instead of looking at others and thinking, "how?"  you'll be the one telling others, "this is how our son is paying for college".  

If interested in finding out what other parents know...and you can, too...then click on the link below to receive this new and up-to-date "Plan and Pay for College" Course.  We want to be sure to help YOU with getting the answers you need.   

When you realize you're "that" type of student (not the good type, by the way...)

I've been plugging through my course, sitting down every day at my desk and doing the work.  I've printed the handouts and created a folder, and checked out books from the library to read from the suggested book list.  I'm watching videos and taking notes and actually enjoying the material.  But I'm still feeling overwhelmed...while also going as slow as molasses through the course (or so it seems...maybe I'm just dealing with the fact that I'm at the beginning, instead of at the end of my last job where I knew all the info and was the in-house resident expert on college admissions).  Not to sugarcoat it though--they said I was the expert, and then treated me like crap and second-guessed me and micro-managed me and talked behind me.  So even though I knew my stuff, it's so awesome to not be there anymore.  But that means, I'm beginning again.  And I'm beginning in a sector that I never thought I'd be in:  sales.  Business and Marketing and Sales.  I always saw myself in the Humanities + Education world, and now I'm here:  learning about principles of persuasion and calling to action and closing the deal.  I keep hearing references about building a website and contacting clients...which I just think "I'll figure it out" while in my soul I'm like, "you mean...I have to do that?!"  Oh my goodness--it's kind of a battle between my head and heart, and today it's a lot.  Which is why I'm here...writing this and putting off the assignment.  But maybe if I write here, clear up the brain, I actually CAN do the work.

I keep reminding myself of all the things I've told students the last decade:  it's all about frequency and duration.  Students need to be frequent in sitting down daily to do the work, and plan at least 1 hour for the tasks that they just don't want to do.  I would always, always remind them that the first 15 minutes of any assignment / application / essay writing was painful.  It would be hard. It would suck.  There was no way around it, and it didn't mean they were doing anything wrong--it meant they were starting a hard task, and the only way through was simply through.  It would be easy to take a break, and think I'll come back tomorrow.  Easy to just stay on the surface part of knowledge and learning.  Basically the first 15 minutes is about getting the brain to go DEEP and force it to do some deep work for the next 45 minutes.  I've been preaching this for years, and I believe it.  Absolutely.  I've had students in my office who practice this, and the results are phenomenal.  And now...I'm the other student.

Which student?  You ask.

The other student.  The one who says, "let's skip this assignment and get to the real work...I'll be able to do the work when I get there.  I feel a bit of envy for one writer that has great voice and writing and seems to be the perfect copywriter, and I'm over here like, "Um...this is hard.  Do I have to do it?!"  Ugh...I hate that I'm the other student. 

I did the morning mantra and I've created the workspace.  And landed here.  To write.  To write and get it all out.  I think I'm struggling with the copy because there are rules and guidelines that I need to remember and use, and I can't.  Is this what it's like to be back in 9th grade, when they're telling me to write a 5-paragraph essay, and it feels so forced and contrived and hard?  Probably.  It's been a minute since I was there.  Okay...it's been more than a minute.  It's been THIRTY YEARS.  Thirty years since I was at the beginning...the real beginning of an educational path.  And now, I'm here again.  I remember thinking through this when I signed up for the course--how I was a good student, enjoyed learning, and I could do this.  I had done it with teaching, and I did it with college admissions--I knew next to nothing about college (except I had attended), and suddenly I was advising students on college admissions.  Well...same thing here.  The only thing I know about sales is that I have low sales-resistance.  Like...I'm the worst.  Or the best target for a salesman / sales pitch / sales promotion.  And now I'm studying it.  So.  Darn.  Funny.  Today it seems funny.

Funny enough that my brain is loosening up and I'm going to go back to the assignment and hammer it out.  The first 15 minutes is over, and I'm still here.  My phone is not visible, so I'm not going to be disturbed  I'm going to practice the frequency + duration for myself, and I bet it will even work (darn my own good advice!)  Because when you're that type of student, you need some good pep-talks and free-writing sessions to get in gear!

Milestones with Meaning

It happened.  

The big thing I've been waiting for.  

Yesterday, the girls mowed the lawn.  Then, when they came inside, I ushered them back outside with their younger brother.  We walked around the yard, me guiding them and highlighting several projects that needed completing.  They asked some questions, and I explained what needed to be done, and then I walked back inside.  

An hour later, I heard music coming from the backyard.  My daughter is the main DJ for our house, since she is the one with the Spotify account.  It was some sort of Meghan Trainer + Taylor Swift playlist, which wasn't a surprise.  I sat there working on my laptop, thinking, "that's cool--they've found a way to make yardwork more enjoyable."  Awhile later, I heard "A Hard Day's Night", and "Eight Days a Week" and knew that my son had made his musical opinion known.  They continued to work on the yard while listening to music.  I kept working on my assignments, trying to stay focused, while occasionally slipping into absent-mindedly singing Beatles lyrics.  How can I not sing "Come on, come on, come on, baby now...Twist and Shout!"?  I kind of got lost in my work and forgot that the music was mainly to help my kids keep working.

Two hours later, I heard the kitchen door open and close.  10 seconds later, a petition from my daughter to "come and see".  And when I went outside, they were now guiding me through the yard, pointing out the place they had trimmed back the grass, pulled weeds, and cut back the vines that were taking over the wooden steps leading to our backyard.  They accomplished in 3 hours what would have taken me two days of work.  They're younger and faster and less prone to getting distracted.  And it was amazing to see and just feel that we were at a milestone.

I'm not a big one for classic milestones, like the first day of school.  Honestly, most years I'm pretty tired from the summer and so feel mostly relieved to get to the first day of school.  I take the obligatory pictures of course, but I don't cry when my kids go through the front door and leave me alone.  I usually go home and take a nap and do nothing for the day.  But there are other days without fanfare that are the real milestones for me.  Yesterday was one of them:  my kiddos working for 3 hours on their own.  They used pruning shears and didn't get injured (milestone!).  They put all the grass clippings, weeds, and pinecones in the garbage cans swept up the dust on the patio (milestone!).  They put away the lawnmower and gloves into the shed without me reminding them (milestone!).  There were no pictures, no applause, no big moment.  Except that it was the big moment.  It was the milestone to say, "they're growing up."  So, I'll keep it in my heart and memories and jot it down here to remember that perhaps the milestones without fanfare are the biggest milestones with meaning.   

Coming Back

Here I am.  June of 2023.  I'm back here because I'm on my new career (freelance copywriting), and want to practice writing again.  Going through old posts has me wondering, "Why did I stop?  These are funny and good and I'm so glad I wrote them!"  The first question is answered simply:  I didn't think I was any good.  In fact, I thought I was no good.  I didn't get comments or views, which meant "failure" in my mind.  And to be honest, I think I was doing it more to be seen by others than for myself.  I'm back because I now see success and failure different.  I see success as continuing with hobbies and interests I love.  This blog seems like a good place to think and write, which I love to do.  And because I'm now doing it for me, who cares who sees it / doesn't see it?  I read a post from 2012 that made me laugh so hard today...11 years later.  Maybe that crap I'm going through today will make me laugh in another 11 years. So, going to write again. Also, I'm a writing addict--I have multiple journals going at once, and write on any paper in any meeting, in every margin of every book.  But I like how the blog gives space to write while working on some "polish" to that writing. And hopefully that will help give a place to write while I'm figuring out the new job.  The paying job.  Which is different than my other job: being a mom.  Which is what I'll mostly stick to writing here.   

So, I'll write about what I saw yesterday.  I took the kiddos on a hike to Waterfall Canyon.  It was our first hike of the year, and we've sadly missed the lime-green on leaves that happens earlier in the spring.  We waited because of the deep snowpack this year--and apparently we didn't wait long enough.  We made it about one-third up the actual canyon before we got to a spot where the trail was literally covered by a river.  Yes, a river.  It was at least 2 feet in places.  We saw some adults forging through, but my thoughts were primarily to keep my kids safe and happy.  Noel (the un-enthusiastic hiker) was actually having a good time, and I want to keep that going for the rest of the year.  Juliet wanted to keep going, because she will try anything.  A little scary, actually.  Chaim was totally willing and ready to be brave, but he would be up to his waist in that fast and frigid water, fighting an incredibly strong current.  So, we turned around.  The cool thing?  No one had a tantrum or complained--they simply understood why we needed to turn around.  And so we hiked back down and had a great time.  We ate apples and granola bars on the side of the trail sitting on dirt instead of at the beautiful waterfall, and it was great.  They laughed and sang and teased each other.  On the walk back down, there was a moment where Juliet reached out and held Chaim's hand, and kept holding it for several moments.  He loved it.  I loved it.  I had thought that reaching the waterfall would be the climax of the hike, but that moment was the climax.  It made my heart swell bigger than seeing the cascading waterfall that I love to see.  That feeling where my heart just feels full and bursting.  So. Darn. Good.  And especially good because I struggle with being a mom and figuring out all the "stuff"--but that moment made me feel like I had gotten one thing right.  My kids love each other.  All the other "stuff" became just that:  stuff.  

Post Note I just want to remember:

On the hike, I will often reach out and grab a branch or tree trunk to help pull me up (yes, I'm that 43-year-old mom that struggles with climbing over rocks and my kids laugh at me).  Anyway, the feel of the tree that has been grabbed thousands of times over the decades is smooth and worn and easy to grab.  The rough bark that usually covers the wood has worn down, and it's this amazing texture.  I love that so many people have used it that it's changed the composite of the branch or tree--but that the tree can still grow AND help people on their journey.  There's something there that I'd love to write about and explore more. 

Fishing

I don't know how to fish.  The pictures that follow are of the girls learning to fish with Noel's awesome preschool teacher, who was incredibly talented at getting the fish off the hook and into the bucket.  I simply took pictures and enjoyed the outing, and paid for someone else to debone the fish.  It was a fish farm, so we were guaranteed to catch fish, which is not a bad idea when you have little ones that expect "fish" when you say "let's go fishing".  They weren't disappointed.

 

  

 

 

   

Update on Becoming

Just wanted to update:  it's Friday and I have practiced the piano FOUR times since Monday.  And...I love it.  Chaim still reaches up for the keys, plinking out his own melody while the girls amuse themselves with some make-believe game.  It was 20 minutes that I took from laundry, from dishes, even from playing a game with the kids.  But the trick of it is this:  those 20 minutes made me a happier mom for the next SIX hours.  I still played the Tangled game with the girls (a painful game to play, I must add), chased Chaim around after his nap, and took all 3 kiddos to the playground.  I was definitely more patient for requests for another snack and an extra five minutes on the swings.  The reason for this super patience?  I think it's because I took time to practice the piano, to invest a little time on becoming the person I want to become.  By the way...I am past the first two lines of the piece.  I'm actually making some progress, however slow it is. 

The art of 'becoming' late in the game

I practiced the piano yesterday for 20 minutes because I wanted to.  Chaim tried to reach the keys and plinked as best he could while I practiced the first two lines of two different songs.  I didn't just play the songs I already knew, which is the way my bi-monthly practice sessions usually go, but instead kept reminding myself to stick with it.  It's just so much easier to flitter through songs I've known for years, but then I'm not actually learning anything.  And this is the point that I'm figuring out:  it's not too late to learn, it's not too late to become the person I want to become. 

Sometimes I fall into a trap of thinking that I'm already there--this is who I am, because I don't have any time to devote to becoming the full version of myself.  All my time is devoted to all that "stuff" that having a family and kids and a job, albeit part-time, demands.  But somewhere in there, I'm trying to carve out some time to keep on becoming.  This is a scary statement.  It's scary to say at this point in the game of life, "I'd like to try something new, and I might look silly doing it, or make a lot of mistakes, and need someone to teach me things."  I'm the adult here--I'm supposed to have some answers, but instead, I'd like to be the student again.

I've seen adults try to take on this role, and it's not easy.  My mom was a piano teacher for 20 years, and only once did she ever have a piano student that was older than 18 years old.  In fact, he was probably about 35 years old, which seemed ancient in my 10-year old world.  I thought that adults didn't learn new skills at that point:  you either played the piano or you didn't play the piano.  But here he was, coming for his lesson every week, struggling through theory just like the rest of us.  He was trying to become a pianist, and that meant that he had to put in the work to practice and stick with it. 

Here I am, 35 years old, an ancient age to say, "I need to practice the piano."  But I'm going to do it--I want to play better than I do, and I want to believe that I don't have to just settle for who I am--maybe I can still become the person I want to be.  There are lots of different things I want to become (future posts coming), but for this week, I'm going to stick with the piano.  And next week, I'm still going to stick with the piano.  And the point is to stick with it for days and weeks and months, to become the pianist I want to be.  And even though it's a little later in the game of life (I always thought I would have life figured out by age 25), I'm okay to now plod in the art of becoming.

One-liners

These are one-liners I'd like to remember. 

Juliet:  I just need a moment before I'm ready to get out of the car.  (Sometimes it's just so exhausting)

Noel:  ...I know, right?  (She says this at the end of a seemingly obvious statement)

Chaim:  da...da...do...da...do...  (genius, right?)

Noel:  I don't want to talk about it.  (After falling off the bench at dinner.)

Juliet:  I can do jump-overs now!  (a.k.a. somersaults)

Noel:  It's been a big day.  (Again...life is exhausting)

Juliet:  It's okay mom...this is zero.  (I told her she could have 3 Hershey's kisses...she changed it to 4 by starting at zero.  Smart girl) 

Scott:  I'm not mad...(pause with realization)...are you mad?  (I loved this moment of our conversation)

Juliet:  Maybe I can do it when I'm five?  (anything that she'd like to do, but is not allowed to do, ranging from cooking dinner to eating an entire cake after dinner)

Juliet:  That's just a little naughty, right?  (holding up her fingers to signify "little")

Noel:  He looks more funner.  (Her assessment of why Andy Murray should win a tennis match she endured watching with me)

Juliet and Noel:  Let's rock-n-roll!  (As they pile in the car to go anywhere)

The 17th Century Nun Prayer

"It's been rough lately."  I say, as if that explains why Noel hasn't memorized one of her parts for the Preschool Graduation tomorrow.  It doesn't explain why there are four baskets of laundry that we ransack each morning as we get dressed or why we use paper plates more often than not at rushed meals of mac-n-cheese and peas.  It's been rough because we seem to have a rotating sickness in the family, and I know...I'm not the only mom to endure a few sleepless nights with a kid that pukes one, then two, then three, and finally four times on me in a 4-hour span.  Or even better, pukes in a hallway on the way to the bathroom.  (Thanks Noel, for attempting to get to the bathroom...next time, please use the bowl we gave you.)  So, before I really get carried away with this tale of woe (and trust me-there is a tale), here's some food for thought by a 17th Century Nun:

          Lord, You know better than I know myself that I am growing older and will someday be old. Keep me from the fatal habit of thinking I must say something on every subject and on every occassion. Release me from the craving to straighten out everybody's affairs. Make me thoughtful, but not moody. Helpful, but not bossy. With my vast store of wisdom, it seems a pity not to use it all, but You know, Lord, I want a few friends at the end.
          
          Keep my mind free from the endless recital of details; give me wings to get to the point. Seal my lips on my aches and pains. They are increasing, and love of rehearsing them is becoming sweeter as the years go by. I dare not ask for grace enough to enjoy the tales of others' pains, but help me to endure them with patience.

           I dare not ask for improved memory, but for a growing humility and a lessening cocksureness when my memory seems to clash with the memories of others. Teach me the glorious lesson that occassionally, I may be mistaken.          

            Keep me reasonably sweet. I do not want to be a saint - some of them are so hard to live with. But a sour old person is one of the crowning works of the devil. Give me the ability to see good things in unexpected places, and talents in unexpected people. And give me, Lord, the grace to tell them so.
        
             Amen

I love this for so many reasons...probably most of all because it makes me laugh, and at the moment laughter is keeping me afloat.  To be honest, laughter and cookies, because two hours of sleep per night is most definitely NOT the answer to a sane and happy woman!  Hopefully we can all snuggle up and get some real sleep soon.   

If only we could spend everyday at the playground...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now Presenting...the Amazing Girl!

My girls spend a good share of each day pretending...pretending to be princesses, cowgirls, doctors, supergirls, and even the occasional cat.  They dress up in their leotards and tutus, act out plays with absolutely no plot, and enact puppet shows (also with no plot).  But one of my favorite times to watch them is when they begin a spontaneous song-and-dance routine.  Noel will stand and say, "Now Presenting...the Amazing Girl!"  At that line, she runs out of the room, waits 1.2 seconds, and runs in to entertain us.  Soon after, Juliet also begins, "Now Presenting...the Amazing Girl!"  And when she begins singing, I can tell that she truly believes she is amazing.  They both do--they have this unshakable belief that they are beautiful, smart, talented ballerinas and princesses and beloved daughters.

Jump to me.  Every morning, I get on the scale.  One morning, the number was ten less than the day before.  I was elated.  Not just for that moment, but for the rest of the day.  I thought I was amazing.  It turns out that our scale was broken, and I re-gained those 10 pounds a few days later.  That day was horrible.  I felt ugly, my clothes didn't fit right, and I avoided every mirror in the house.  And for that reason, I want to throw away my scale.  I don't want my image of myself to be directed by the number I see on the scale.  I want to get up in the morning, and say, "Now presenting...the Amazing Girl!"  I want to really believe it, too, just like Noel and Juliet believe it.  The thing is...they don't just believe it about them, they believe it about me.

I read somewhere that a daughter looks at her mother as the most beautiful woman she knows.  The mom is essentially the queen in this little girl's world.  And when that beautiful woman says she is fat or ugly, it wreaks havoc on that little girl's image of herself.  That little girl eventually becomes a teenager, and when the same mother tells that girl that she looks beautiful, she doesn't believe her.  How can she be beautiful if the number on the scale is too big?  And she feels that her value is intrinsically attached to a number on the scale, just like her mom does.  I don't want my girls to go through that, so I'm trying to change now so that I see myself as beautiful, and so that they never doubt their own beauty. 

So, guess what?  I'm trying something new.  I get out of bed in the morning, and have a little chat with myself in front of the mirror.  I stand and tell myself that I am strong and beautiful--and that the tummy which is more round--is also the same tummy that held three little babies.  And those legs that don't necessarily fit in skinny jeans are the same legs that chase the kids up the stairs in a game of tag.  They are strong and useful, and dare I say it...beautiful?   And before I walk away, I look straight in the mirror and say, "Now presenting...the Amazing Girl!" Granted, I feel a little silly.  But feeling silly makes me smile, and I start laughing, and I remember that I'm kind of a funny person.  Mind you, I'm no Lucille Ball, but it's much better to start my day thinking "I'm a funny person" instead of "I'm no good because the scale says that I weigh xxx pounds."  And because I'm a funny person, I end up playing circus events with the kids at lunch, throwing grapes into my mouth, or doing Animal-Yoga with my kids, or even pretending to be the cat in their play (still with no plot).  I don't sit around, berating myself for how I look or what size I am. Instead, I am funny and helpful, engaged in my own life.  I become that Amazing Girl.  

Here's the catch:  I know that number on the scale needs to go down so that I can be healthier.  I'm eating brown rice and cauliflower and spinach to be healthier, and I am succeeding on that front.  But none of that will matter if I don't first see myself as a strong, beautiful woman today.  I can make sure that I'm checking in with myself for a dose of image-reality, and not letting a number dictate how I feel about my worth.  And for that reason, when tomorrow morning comes, I won't get on the scale.  I'll stand in front of the mirror and say, "Now Presenting...the Amazing Girl!"  The cool thing?  I'm starting to believe, too. 

Inception

Sheepish.  Exultant.  I waffle between these two feelings...a result of recent spur-of-the-moment and in-my-sleep actions. 

First:  Sheepish.  A week ago, I was watching an infomercial.  I've seen it 3 or 4 times, and this time they were so convincing.  It was for the 21-Day-Fix, and trust me when I say, I needed to "fix" my eating habits.  When you are eating Golden Oreos between every meal, it's time for something drastic.  So when the lady kept saying, "It's just so easy...you can eat anything that fits in these containers", I believed her.  Suddenly, I was on the phone ordering that 21-Day-Fix.  The guy taking my order was over-the-top polite, complimenting me on my lifestyle change, asking if I would like to upgrade to the "Ultimate Package".  Turns out the Ultimate Package was sixty dollars, and luckily, I heard Scott's voice in the background, "What is this sixty dollar charge on our card?"  So, I kept to the basic package for the poor folks, and waited patiently for the package to arrive.

Later that day, I was putting Chaim's carseat in the car and torqued my back.  As in:  seriously hurt it.  For the next 4 days...I laid on the floor with Epson salt compresses on my back, slept in the Lay-Z-Boy chair, and ate Golden Oreos.  When the package arrived, I didn't open it for two days, because I couldn't lift it off the ground.  Finally, when I opened it, those seemingly huge containers turned into teeny-tiny boxes.  That box sat on our kitchen table for another 2 days.  It was easy to avoid while eating Golden Oreos and driving to the physio-therapist for yet another appointment.  Finally, I could walk on Saturday, and I enjoyed celebrating Easter by expanding my food choices to three different varieties of cake (supplemented by an occasional oreo).

I went to bed on Sunday night, thinking "I'll start that 21-Day Fix later this week..." Sometime during the night, I had a dream that I was on my diet.  I stopped eating oreos.  I filled those teeny-tiny boxes with broccoli and cauliflower.  And when I woke up in the morning, the idea was fixed:  I was healthy.  It was like my own little version of Inception--and the idea had firmly planted.  And this is why I'm exultant--there is a half-eaten bag of Golden Oreos in the pantry, and I couldn't care less.  I am, however, excited for my plain oatmeal with cinnamon for breakfast, which fits in the little yellow box.  Exultant.

 

Why Are You Here?

"Why Are You Here?"  He asked, the sixth specialist we saw this morning.  Contrary to the words, it wasn't a rude question.  It was an honest question:  why was Chaim here?  And he didn't mean here as in alive, he meant here as in sitting in my office.  He was simply puzzled by Chaim. 

Another specialist siting at the far side of the room finally interjected:  "Hypoxic Ischemic." 

And so it was:  Hypoxic Ischemic, a condition where a baby is born under trauma, without oxygen.  If treatment doesn't happen quickly (within 1-2 minutes), brain damage will occur.  Little Chaim was born without oxygen--but looking at him now, you'd never guess it.  We still have to see specialists to make sure he meets his milestones, but we are all amazed at how strong his body is, and especially how active and alert his mind is. 

"It's amazing," the doctor went on, "The cooling cap has changed everything. Before the cap, these kids would have all sorts of brain problems.  They wouldn't grab things.  They wouldn't roll over.  They wouldn't ever be able to master certain skills.  Now..."  His voice trailed off, and we both were looking at Chaim.  Now...we have Chaim.

My Chaim.  My amazing little boy that is rolling over and grabbing things and laughing and babbling...and living.  I will never get over the miracle of Chaim.  I hold heaven every time I hold him, and he has changed my life.  He has made me love more deeply--spending time with the people I love rather than making excuses about "getting there next time".  I'm a better mom to Noel and Juliet, because somehow the fragility of life is very real to me.  I'm a better wife to Scott, who comforted me during those first hours, days, and weeks of Chaim's life.  It's an experience I wouldn't wish for anyone to go through--and yet, I'm so grateful for all the lessons I've learned about LIFE.  I am grateful for the cooling cap, and the doctors and nurses that knew exactly what to do in the moment. 

Grateful for so many things to the point that if a specialist asks again:  "Why Are You Here?" I may very well say, "Because of miracles." 

One Snow Day

It has been the most un-winter winter of our lives.  Finally, it snowed in March.  We played in the snow for 2 straight days:  making a snowman, throwing snowballs, and sledding down the hill behind our house.  I often wonder why we bought this house when there are too many remodeling projects (like an ENTIRE unfinished basement).  But on our snow day, I remembered.  We bought this house to be next to a park, and to have a gate in our that opens on to a HUGE sledding hill.  We walked out the door, went sledding, and came in the house for lunch--went sledding again for a few hours, came in for hot cocoa--went sledding again, and finally came in for dinner.  Noel asked if she could stay home from preschool, and being the mom I am, I gladly said yes.  Not only did she want to play in the snow--I wanted to play in the snow!  The funny thing is that out of 11 kids in her preschool, 8 other kids played hooky that day.  Glad to know I'm in good company on the snow day policy!

 (This video is of the girls sledding down the little hill in our backyard.  They did it maybe five times before advancing to the BIG hill just beyond our gate.  It was a good "starter hill", but it was so fun to go down the big hill.  Sorry--no movies of the big hill.  I was too busy sledding!)

A Slice of Our Life

I made a sort of "goal" to write on my blog once a week, but the problem is that there isn't anything big to write about this week.  There were big moments--moments where I was trying to get three kids in carseats, moments when Chaim had to wait too long to be fed, moments where Noel and Juliet wanted the same spot on the bench--but nothing that I really wanted to write a post about.  So in lieu of a post that says something really meaningful, here's a snapshot of our life.  No specific order, mind you.

Conversation with Noel:

"Mom, how old are you?"
"I'm 35."
"Wow.  That's old."
"Yup."
"You are going to die someday."

It's nice to have the perspective of a 5-year old on my age.

I worked on Monday from 10:00 a.m. - 8:00 p.m. because we hosted a FAFSA night.  My mom watched the girls during the day--letting them watercolor AND make play-doh volcanos, complete with lava spewing out of the volcano.  I usually only accomplish one "crafty" thing in a day (sometimes in a week).  Scottie watched the kids when he got home.  He made pigs in a blanket for dinner, which the girls talked about for the rest of the week.  I obviously need to up my "fun meter", and throw out the sound nutrition of meal planning every once in a while.

Speaking of cooking, I made three casseroles in one week.  This is something considering that I have never used cream of mushroom soup in a recipe until now.  I loved it.  The kids loved it.  Scott loved it.  And it made the nights when Scott was at school somehow do-able.  I have never made casseroles (a very long story that could be analyzed by Freud himself), but I've luckily turned that corner in my life.  Next week:  tuna noodle casserole.  I don't know why, but I'm very intrigued by the legend of this casserole.

One day the girls were talking with Scottie, and he said something that was different than they understood.  Jules took it in stride, looked at me and said, "Mom, what do you think?"  It's nice to know that to my four-year-old, my opinion still matters. 

We had a doctor's checkup this week.  Juliet thought the eye exam was hilarious, since she had to cover up one of her eyes with a big black spoon.  She kept saying "Aaarrgghh!" and pretending to be a pirate.  I thought it was hilarious, the nurse didn't know how to make her say "star" when she pointed to the star.  Chaim was another enigma for the doctor.  He smiles and is happy all the time, loves to drool, but he had little interest in her stethoscope.  I guess most kids try to gobble it up during the exam.  According to her, he is still in the "normal range", but he needs to be doing more with his fine-motor skills.  I'm trying to not over-analyze this milestone.

And my technology triumph of the week is that I finally downloaded new games on the LeapPad.  They've had it for 13 months.  This should explain why there aren't any pictures with this post--they are on the camera, and it might be another 13 months before I download them.